Hope?

I want to feel 'hope'... hopeful... that hopefully... one day... I sit in front of my Gohonzan, candles lit, incense burning, legs folded, plant, water, beads. I stare at the mandala in its white wooden Butsudan (cabinet for mandala; Gohonzan) hoping for some strength to return to my being. Hopeful if I chant for long … Continue reading Hope?

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Cutting

I have spent the morning crying mostly. Lost job due to depression and my capability to perform my job (mutually agreed) and have received an eviction notice from my landlord. After sobbing in a heap on my mock Turkish Rug and screaming/crying at various people down the phone I decide eating is the way forward. … Continue reading Cutting